Dream Crusher

[Alunalun]

Hey! You didn't make my wish go sour, you just didn't grant it at all! > : (

You stop thinking about horrible things and lose your job as horror movie director, because you find you can no longer pay attention to what's happening in front of the cameras.

I wish I had a kinder egg.

[Android]

Later you find out that they stopped producing them for good when it was known they contained drugs.

So you end up committing suicide.


I wish I had a Truck that could transform into a human-like robot.

[Alunalun]

You can't have one so you kill yourself.

I wish people in this thread got their wishes.

[Android]

Ain't shit for free. So they all commit suicide.

I wish I had the energy to go eat something.

[Natch]

You get so much energy that your face illuminates.

For ever.

I wish I could turn lightbulbs on at will, with mind control.

[Alunalun]

You turn all the lights off in the whole of the day side of the earth, to save energy and reduce the scale of the imminent climate-change mass extinction event. The USA CIA special forces don't understand, get angry and kill you as a terrorist.

Confucius can't have the power to teleoperate lightbulbs so he kills himself.

I wish I could type faster, like 200 words a minute.

[Android]

You learned how to do it, but your fingers suffered from not enough blood circulation so they had to be amputated, thus shattering that dream.

I wish I cared about what you write.

[Natch]

You write three novels in five days. The public don't believe it though, and disregard you. Well, except for the people that hang you as a witch.

I wish I had a brain.

[Android]

You come to realize there is no purpose for you to have a brain and soon the people know you have no brain, therefore they burn you for being a zombie.

I wish I were 2480 years younger.

[Natch]

You become so. But you still can't get a date.

I wish I had courage.